Tag: #mentalhealth

Wednesday Woes Sprinkled With A Glimmer Of Hope

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It’s Wednesday, which means I’m sitting here willing people to walk into our local business.
The word “slow” is too fast for how business is these days. When we opened this business in October 2024 we had no idea by November 2024 things would start a downward plunge for the economy and for small businesses. “Open your own business” they said. “Be your own boss” they said. No one ever said, “Hey the economy might tank by the end of 2025”. That advice would have been much appreciated. I guess we should have seen it coming. However, we didn’t realize the severity of how hard and fast it was going to happen.

So… I site here hopeful. Willing customers to come in. Our November rent, utilities, and taxes not paid yet. We’ve used all of our personal money to stay a float during the summer, so there’s nothing left. I got rid of my health insurance, cut back on finances, scraping change for groceries & gas… it’s been difficult. We poured everything in to this place. Painted every wall, moved everything in here, sacrificed paying ourselves last month so we could get some bills paid and the staff. It’s hard to not feel completely helpless & hopeless.

So what does one do when they feel this … shitty? Well, I opened the doors, lit some incense, put on some tunes, grabbed an ice coffee, and sucked it up. We can’t give up hope. Something good can happen… right? Right?? I can either cry and be completely terrified.
Or.. I can take a deep breath, roll up my sleeves, and put that axe to the grind. I don’t want to give up. I’m so tired of watching people give up or dealing with that feeling of people giving up on me. Fuck It. I’m not the type to give up. I will fight another day AND be fucking terrified, worried, and hella sad (but I will put on a brave face). Fake it to ya make it right? Right??

Instead I’m gonna focus on the happier things coming up:
*Driving through neighborhoods, looking at Christmas lights while listening to holiday tunes and sipping on a peppermint hot chocolate.
*Enjoying the beautiful weather this time of year. Nothing is better than sleeping with a window cracked open under a ton of blankets.
* Taylor Swift’s documentary series and the “Final Show” streaming this month. (come on.. you knew I was gonna add that. It’s currently the #1 thing I’m really looking forward to lately)
*Watching Holiday Movies and being cozy.
*Watching videos online of kids getting new pets or animals finding new homes (gets me every time)
*Dogma … fucking finally… being released to streaming services. Hallelujah!
*Thinking about how beautiful my mom made the holidays. Although it makes me incredibly sad, those memories remind me that even during some of the most horrifying and brutal times.. you can still make something good out of things. She always did that. This topic deserves a whole blog post in itself. So.. I’m gonna stop here.

My heart has been pretty heavy lately. I’m desperately trying to make things good out of bad. Mentally, I’m exhausted. Emotionally, I’m fighting for a little bit of hope.
Hope… it’s something I’m still into. It’s sometimes the only thing we have.
I’ve never had much luck with it. It usually proves me to be a silly dreamer, wishing for the best, wishing on starts, wishing for the universe to hear me, wishing for someone to like me for me… that sort of thing. Most times it turns out to be a lost cause or a heartbreaking disappointment. Yet, I turn up the music, sip my last drop of coffee in my cup, take a deep breath, and hope.

(not edited because I’m not with it today)


Back To The Music

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Hello there! It’s been a bit since we’ve talked music. Honestly, with all the stupid shit going on in the world, I haven’t been enjoying anything. From health, to financials, the United States being a total shit show, and coming to the realization of just how awful people really are …
I haven’t been in the mood to pretend to be OK.

After a long weekend of being at my breaking point, I decided to turn back to music. I’d rather distract myself from the outside noise and worry than sit here a nervous wreck over everything. So …. where do we start? This summer has been a lot of highs and lows in music and I say we go back to the month of July.

Ozzy
The death of Ozzy Osbourne wasn’t a surprise to most people. His family and Ozzy himself had been talking about his health decline for a while now. Still… when the news came across
it did shock me a bit. I never listened to his music, was a big fan of the Osbourne’s reality show, but that genre of music was never my thing. With that being said, I still knew of his work and respected his craft. It was heartbreaking to watch the family grieve his loss and I wasn’t even a big fan of his music so I can’t imagine how his biggest fans felt hearing the news of his passing. Rest in Peace Ozzy.

Summer Music Releases
In July, we saw a handful of various artist drop albums. Backstreet Boys, Ciara, Madonna and Alice Cooper. Did you listen to any of those? I sure didn’t. I didn’t know these new albums existed. It wasn’t until the Backstreet Boys did their concert at The Sphere in Vegas I even realized that they were singing together again. I’ve seen a lot of video footage from The Sphere from various shows… the Backstreet Boys footage didn’t do it for me. Over the summer we saw footage of U2, the Wizard of Oz, and some electronica music that I’ve never heard before but the show they put on was friggin bad ass. I would have paid for that and I’m not even a fan of that kind of music. The Backstreet Boys video footage was … meh.
Was I surprise? Nope. Madonna put out music and I never heard a peep about it. Not one word. However, a young man named Alex Warren released his first album, “You’ll be alright, Kid” and the new single that will be added to many wedding’s playlist was born, “Ordinary”.
This song would earn Alex many nominations and he went on to win Best New Artist at the 2025 VMA Awards ( don’t get me fucking started on the VMA’s, I don’t know how a channel that doesn’t play music gets to have an award show… so dumb) Many people are annoyed with this song much like when Ed Sheeran jumped on the scene. I’m biased. I’ve been following Alex and his wife Kouver on social media since 2020 and I loved following their story.
How can anyone watch the video to “Ordinary” and not smile or even shed a tear? If you don’t feel something watching that… You may need to question if you have a soul. It’s pretty beautiful.

August slipped away like a bottle of wine… oops sorry… it’s habit.
In August, many albums dropped and many seem to be swings and misses based on where they charted and the number of streams they had.
Renee Rap, Jonas Brothers (Joe Jonas can kick rocks btw), Chance The Rapper, Machine Gun Kelly, Kid Audi, Deftness, Maroon 5 (geezus I will hold my tongue on this one)… they all faded into the streaming abyss but one came out a mother fucking champion and that is
Ms. Sabrina Carpenter. Sabrina’s “Man’s Best Friend” album dropped on August 29th and not without controversy. Many were offended by her album cover saying it was too dirty, feminist weren’t happy, mothers were covering their children’s eyes… these aren’t Gen X people obviously. So Sabrina said, Hold My Beer, and created many cover variants for the album. Now people can choose from the risqué ones to Sabrina holding a puppy. Whatever floats your boat folks. I am a big fan of her other albums “Emails I Can’t Send” and “Short & Sweet”, so I was definitely looking forward to this one. Do I enjoy this new album more than “emails”? Yes. Do I enjoy the new album more than “S & S”. Nope. However, this is a good album and we all know the videos are gonna be amazing. Ever since “Feather” she’s been knocking out of the park with her videos … especially with the theme that she’s is always offing the men in the videos. I find that hilarious and I’m a fan of it. Sabrina Carpenter such a little showgirl. But.. we’ll get back to that later.

(side note: Hayley Williams dropped her new album ( Ego Death At A Bachelorette Party) in August but I am not ready to fully talk about it. It has sent me into a weird place and has awakened something that I don’t want to really face at the moment. It’s great. I just don’t want to dive in to it. The song “Parachute” fucked me up. She has messed me up before with some Paramore jams… but this one hurt. So let’s touch base with her later.)

September things look a little quiet (but not necessarily boring) on the music front with albums dropping from Ed Sheeran, Lola Young, Nine Inch Nails, Dojo Cat, and Mariah Carey.
I do think Doja Cat will come out swinging and drop a great single for sure. She experimented the last go around, many said they were disappointed in the album which some raved it was her best one yet. I do enjoy Tik Tok era of Doja Cat and wasn’t too much of a fan with the most recent drop… I still think she is a highly talented and entertaining singer that is not going down without a fight. I think that’s what I’ve always liked about her. The one album I am looking forward to in September… Cardi B’s “Am I The Drama?” The title alone has got me in a choke hold to see what she’s going to bring to the table. Cardi B had all social media platforms cracking up from her summer trial. Some of the funnest moments of the summer ( Hello?… Hello?? fucking kills me every time!) and it was refreshing to watch the trial and not think about anything else that’s been going on lately. Cardi B always comes through with one or two hard hitting & fun tracks that make you clutch your pears while dancing your ass off. I’m ready for a good dance off.

So what’s next? Don’t be ridiculous.
Ya’ll KNOW I’m waiting on pins and needles for October 3rd. Taylor Swift is dropping “Life Of A Show Girl” including a track with our tiniest showgirl Sabrina Carpenter. In usually Taylor fashion, the past month has been secret countdowns, Easter Eggs, announcements and her engagement to Travis Kelce. This new album… I’m considering it a birthday gift. Plus this has actually given me something to look forward to. I haven’t had too many of those moments lately. I’ve seen some of the album cover variants, still shots, and a small video clip … I am loving the aesthetic and the costuming is being done by Bob Mackie. So what could this mean? Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised to see Taylor headlining Vegas or doing “Life Of A Showgirl” in the Vegas Sphere. I can see her watching footage of others shows in the Sphere and thinking … I wanna fucking do that. I think it would be so fun and the Bob Mackie costuming would fit in Vegas perfectly. It wouldn’t have to be a big run like the Eras Tour was. Just a smaller run in Vegas would be outstanding. Rumors are swirling around that she could be performing at the half time show. I’m not sure about that… but I’ll guess we shall see. I could see her teaming up with Sabrina Carpenter and the HAIM sisters for a fun show.

Music Festivals
As far as concerts go, there has been some tremendous talent on tour this summer oh and Katy Perry. But much to my surprise… Lollapalooza is still alive and kicking and brought artists like Tyler the Creator, Olivia Rodrigo (friends I promise I won’t my soapbox on this girl… but seriously someone get her a better team. Geezus), Sabrina Carpenter, and Doechii. I would have loved to see Doechii perform live. There was a mishap this summer when she played too long and they pull the plug on her show in the middle of a song and she went Super Sonic Angry. But girl… there’s a time limit. I love you but buy a watch or something. Damn.
The “When We Were Young” Music festival kicks off in Vegas October 18-19. If I wasn’t married to my job and had to work every single moment of my life to stay a float, I would go to this mother fucker. Blink 182, Panic! At the Disco, Avril Lavigne (meh), the Offspring (meh meh) but then they put Weezer on the line-up. I fucking LOVE Weezer. Guess what my favorite song is? If you guess right we will be best friends but I bet you won’t guess it right. Haha!

Lately, I’ve been listening to a lot of : Amyl & The Sniffers, Rage Against The Machine, Cheap Perfume, Green Day, Paramore, Gracie Abrams, The Belair Lip Bombs, The Bangles and Hayley Williams new solo album. What have you been listening to that has gotten you through life lately?

Coming Up: VMA’s Recap & Rants
In closing…. Take care of yourself out there.Shit is bat shit crazy and I’m about to sell grapefruit on corners and sell a kidney on the black market (that is a joke so please don’t censor my blog for a joke and claim it’s saying harmful things. I’m fucking tired of these platforms censoring EVERYTHING because people are whiny bitches) Also try to be nice to people (yes, I did just say that after calling you a whiny bitch), don’t hurt anyone, don’t point fingers at people especially when you don’t know what you’re fucking talking about, be kind to animals, and stop parking over the line. Basically don’t be a savage.
Chat Soon? Have a great rest of your week!

  • If you are new to this blog.. First off Hello.
    Next… I don’t proofread anything. So either ignore the mishaps or use your imagination. I barely have time in the week to do this, I don’t have time to proofread and doll it up. My apologies, I just don’t have the patience. If its something that is a deal breaker for you.. I completely understand. But it’s just not gonna happen.